I have been dealing with a challenging situation. Right now, I feel unappreciated and because I’ve been taken advantage of, and it’s incredibly draining. I think that by prioritising my own mental health is not selfish as it’s essential for my overall happiness and fulfilment. Nowadays, I recognise the importance of setting boundaries and communicating my needs. Surrounding myself with people who appreciate and reciprocate my generosity is crucial for maintaining my well-being.
Throwback Thursday
I don’t think Black people are in the position to be racist because Black people do not have the power or control over the economy, politics, education, recruitment, housing, etc., etc. And if you are in doubt, please watch the “Jane Elliott experiment“ from 1968, it’s a 6 minute video.
““The denial of racism is essential for the survival of racism.””
Plans for the 21st century
The only thing we know about the future is that it will be very different from the present, and it will change at a very rapid rate. We learn new things everyday but mostly one relies on the skills, the worldview, the personality that we acquired in our younger years. People will need very strong psychological resilience to keep learning and changing and throughout their lives. I think to survive and thrive in the 21st century we will require both adaptability and resilience skills.
Fear of the unknown
Everyone makes mistakes, so I think that one should own it, apologise and move on. Don’t spend time explaining or trying to justify yourself even though it’s natural to feel defensive. I think it’s important to understand that human beings don’t always get it right, and you will get it wrong most of the time when you try to defend yourself or make comparisons.
““Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.” ”
A judgment one holds as true
In his “The Psychology of Persuasion,” Dr Robert Cialdini laid out six principles of persuasion: reciprocity, scarcity, authority, consistency, liking, and consensus. These principles illuminate the mechanics of persuasion, indicating that we're more susceptible when we perceive a sense of obligation (reciprocity), when rarity is implied (scarcity), when the persuader exudes credibility (authority), when our actions align with past behaviours (consistency), when we harbour positive feelings toward the persuader (liking), and when we observe others following suit. I think persuasion is an intriguing aspect of psychology and it entails guiding someone's beliefs, choices, or behaviours. Failure to engage in independent thinking renders one vulnerable to succumbing to external influences, be they religious, governmental, corporate, or monetary, perpetuating a cycle of ignorance.
The humble calf
““One of the great challenges in this world is knowing enough about a subject to think you’re right, but not enough about the subject to know you’re wrong.””
Pioneering thinking
The circular economy is a system where materials never become waste and nature is regenerated. In a circular economy, products and materials are kept in circulation through processes like maintenance, reuse, refurbishment, remanufacture, recycling, and composting. The consensus is that regenerative sustainability refers to the process of creating economies and communities that heal the planet. I think that regenerative sustainability will take the concept of “sustainability” up to a new level. What do you think?
Encoding and decoding
The art of reading people requires a keen observation of their behaviour, body language, verbal cues, and emotional expressions, all in pursuit of unraveling their inner thoughts, feelings, and intentions. The greatest advantage to possessing the skill of reading people is that it immensely improves our ability to communicate with them. I think by attuning ourselves to the subtle nuances of human interaction, we gain invaluable insights into the perspectives and motives of those around us. It’s a powerful social dynamic and a useful way to facilitate meaningful and harmonious relationships.
Active allyship
Allyship needs to start with an examination of self, to better understand the power, privilege, and access available to you as an individual, as a result of the different identity groups to which you belong. Being an ally also requires deep education about the communities that you’re interested in demonstrating allyship toward. In Denmark, there is a disconnect between how minorities and majority cultures define allyship. The majority culture in Denmark think the most meaningful action they can take is to speak out about gender discrimination, whereas minorities think the best thing an ally can do is advocate for new opportunities. I think that cultural understanding and empathy are crucial for effective allyship efforts in order to have a more inclusive and collaborative approach to addressing issues of inequality and discrimination.
Why is this so difficult?
Intersectionality was coined in 1989 by professor Kimberlé Crenshaw to describe how race, class, gender, and other individual characteristics “intersect” with one another and overlap. For example, I am both Black and a man, so the lived experiences of discrimination from my perspective as a Black man is different from those of a Black woman or a white man’s.
““Intersectionality is a metaphor for understanding the ways that multiple forms of inequality or disadvantage sometimes compound themselves and create obstacles that often are not understood among conventional ways of thinking.””
A sad day for Denmark
Martin Kristiansen
The historic Danish Stock Exchange (Børsen) is burning. The building dates back to 1625, and is approx. 200m away from Denmark's parliament. It’s an extremely sad day for Denmark.
The real deal
Many people think vulnerability was a repellent, and I think it’s the world’s greatest magnet as it brings everybody to you. Nowadays, the greatest supply in the world is the opposite of vulnerability - it’s curating our lives on social media, and only showing the best parts of being successful and having picturesque holidays. On the other hand, the things that are in the highest demand are the things that we can relate to in 99% of our lives - the struggles, insecurities, doubts, etc. These are the elements in highest demand yet in lowest supply. When someone shares their struggles it increases oxytocin levels and we feel more connected to them.
““You cannot transmit something you haven’t got.””
You have to choose
I am always trying to understand:
What are people looking for?
Why are things the way they are?
Why is the layout the way it is?
If it is not working on me, why is it working on other people?
What kind of world view would make this communication effective?
““If you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else.””
The overlap
In recent months, our focus has been on exploring how a deep understanding of intersectionality can enhance the sense of belonging in the Danish workplace. We've developed a comprehensive framework that emphasises the difference between equality and equity, and we've introduced an identity wheel as a tool to actively support marginalised groups. Our next step is to finalise the framework and begin testing it within focused groups comprising leaders and managers. Our ultimate goal is to enhance decision-making processes and foster more meaningful interpersonal connections.
The tip of the spear
Democracy is being able to speak your mind but with respect and without oppression. I think it's about persuading others through reasoned arguments and maintaining composure is crucial, especially the people in power as they should lead by example. When our government falls short in fostering such an environment, it falls upon us, as citizens, to counteract the polarisation that plagues our society.
““Never hold your head down, never say you can’t, never limit yourself, and never stop believing.””
Where do I belong?
Too Black to be British,
Too British to be Black,
Too British to be Jamaican,
Too Jamaican to be African,
Who am I?
Speaking about it with humour
The American comedian, Andrew Schulz performs in front of audiences who are completely mixed in every sense, they are properly represented and diverse. Schulz solves the diversity problem in a rather interesting way, not by pretending that touchy subjects like race or gender don't exist but by highlighting the distinctions and taking the "mickey" out of them. Perhaps from a creative point of view this is a better way to incorporate the diversity with humour rather than being politically correct and skipping around the topics. Do you pretend to make people not notice ethnic differences? Are you anxious in the presence of any of those differences, or do you acknowledge them and make light of them?
The known unknowns
When we fail to recognise context, events are misunderstood and energies are misplaced. I think some leaders miss the essential competency of seeing, understanding, and mastering the systemic contexts in which we and others exist. Contact me via e-mail and let’s discuss your context blindspots.
Change is on its way
Communication comes in both words and deeds, so clear procedures, goals, methods, and deadlines are required. In successful transformations, leaders actively look for ways to obtain clear performance improvements, establish goals in an annual planning system, achieve these objectives, and reward the people involved with recognition, promotions, or financial incentives. Nothing undermines the communication of a change vision more than the behaviour on the part of key players that seems inconsistent with the vision. I think attitude training is just as important as skills training as guilt, political considerations and concerns over short-term results stop people from having honest discussions. It’s not possible to change habits built up over years and in some cases decades after only one workshop.
Contact me via e-mail to book an appointment.
““Language isn’t just a means of communication, it’s a reservoir of memory, tradition, and heritage.” ”
Humility and sensitivity
c/o Penn Medicine
I am always going to be misunderstood!
I have been prepared for character assassination, being marginalised, and pushed to the side when it comes to trying to tell the truth about people whose suffering has been rendered invisible for so long in the mainstream narrative. I’m not claiming to be right, and I have been thinking about it for decades, so I am open to challenges to my findings. Raised by deeply humble parents who instilled in my sisters and myself the values of treating others with respect and humility, and to never ever think you are better than anybody else.
““The reason facts don’t change most people’s opinions is because most people don’t use facts to form their opinions. They use their opinions to form their facts.””