Everyone is fighting an internal battle, whether it’s in their relationships, mental health, or finances. That’s why showing a little more compassion every day is so important as we rarely know what others are going through. It’s easy to be critical or judgmental, especially when someone has different political views, opinions, or even behaves rudely. I think choosing kindness may make a bigger difference than we realise.
““Do not assume you’re smarter simply because you’re older.” ”
Yesterday it was a particularly hot day in Copenhagen, and I met an older woman while standing in the supermarket queue. She casually mentioned, "Remember to put out the fires and water the flowers." I found this brilliant as it perfectly captures how businesses should manage their relationships with customers. If you only engage with customers when they complain, you train them to speak up only when they have something negative to say.
When a company focuses solely on addressing problems, “putting out fires”, it risks creating an environment where customer interaction is driven by issues alone. Over time, customers begin to associate the brand with complaints. However, by also celebrating positive moments and rewarding loyalty, “watering the flowers”, the company will foster more positive relationships. By recognising and appreciating customers when they’re happy, the business encourages them to share their positive experiences, creating a more balanced and open connection.
The voice of the customer is crucial in today's business landscape, as it offers invaluable insights into their needs, preferences, and pain points. I think by actively listening to customers, businesses can foster trust, loyalty, and differentiation, particularly in industries where products or services are commoditised. Moreover, when incorporating customer feedback into innovation processes this enables companies to develop offerings that better align with market demands. And by addressing customer concerns promptly this will reduce churn rates, allowing businesses to stay agile and adapt their strategies to changing market conditions.
Do you think that trust is the emotional glue of all relationships?
Trust is the cornerstone of all relationships, acting as a binding agent that holds them together. I think building trust is like forging a path beyond our comfort zones, creating bridges to meaningful connections. It thrives on honesty, accountability, and openness to cultivate and maintain trust in any relationship. Trust might not be the sole emotional glue for every relationship, for example, respect, communication, empathy, and shared values also plays a significant role in sustaining strong and healthy connections.
Sales is often associated with closing deals and achieving excellent sales results. However, true sales excellence is not just about hitting numbers, it is about becoming a student of all the variables and parameters involved in the playing field. I think this starts with building relationships and utilising resources, and the ultimate goal should be to become a trusted advisor to your clients. And if this is achieved then deals and sales results will come as a by-product of these relationships. To build strong relationships, honesty and sincerity are essential. Instead of rattling off a list of the great things about your product or service, acknowledge the limitations and show a willingness to learn about the client’s needs and priorities. By doing so, you will stand out from other salespersons, and your authenticity will help build trust with your potential clients.
Sales is a series of asking for commitments and all salespersons - regardless of who you are or what you are selling – have two primary concerns:
1. RESULTS
- Did you make the sale?
- Did you bring in the money for your company?
- Will you receive your commission?
Everyone ultimately wants to achieve tangible results.
2. RELATIONSHIPS
- Did your client enjoy the selling process?
- Do they now know, like and trust you?
- Did they enjoy your selling process enough to speak positively about you and your company by giving you a referral?
I think the balance between achieving results and nurturing relationships with clients is essential for successful salespersons. Contact me via e-mail for sales training and workshops.
The most basic human desire is to feel like we belong, it’s so powerful. Everything you say and everything you do has to prove what you believe. When you are in an environment where you don’t feel you belong, you seek out anyone who may share the same values and beliefs as you so that you can start to form trusting relationships. This is why I think this cannot be recreated over our computers, it’s our biology as human beings that gives us this ability, and it’s this ability to read each other which has enabled us to evolve. I don’t believe you can replace these human experiences and human feelings over the internet. Contact me via e-mail and let me know your feelings around this topic.
Everyone who you come into contacts with wants to know what’s in it for them and they don’t really tell you what they are going to get out of it, they may not even know or realise, nor want to admit it. One thing for sure is that they are thinking about it because it’s a selfish desire and in most cases, they wouldn’t care if it wasn’t selfish. Once you figure out what it is and you genuinely understand these concepts, you can use it for good or you can use it mysteriously, and this is so powerful that professional salespersons need to keep it in check.
Just imagine that you had a framework of questions that would unveil what your buyers vested interest were and a guided series of “need/payoff” questions that align with your buyers. These questions are just as valid in a romantic scenario and I know they will give you an advantage over your competitors. Contact me via e-mail if you are interested learning these concepts?
Why is it necessary to know people before you ever need them?
Remember that if you can build people up then you can build a business. In my experience I have found that sometimes people have ulterior motives with regards to the relationships they enter into. I think that when you create authentic relationships, you’ll see other possibilities to help each other along the way. My parents gave us the wings to try something new and they constantly told us that there is only one business and that’s the people business. It doesn’t matter what industry you work in, if you take the people out of the business, you’ll have nothing at all.
c/o BBC
New technologies will always encourage different types of thinking, the symbiosis between humans, machines and nature has enabledI us to move forward in new ways. Some things never change, for example, relationships. You get what you pay for and this especially true in relationships, so if you truly want them to be great, then you are going to have to invest in them. I’m a believer in therapy and anything that makes you look at yourself in a constructive way. There are so many levels to life, I think it’s always beneficial to sit in front of someone who is not going to give you the answers you want. It’s also really important to maintain a student mindset and learn from relationships.
““Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.” - Barbara De Angelis”
Just imagine if we changed our opinion on suffering and from now on we think that suffering is awesome. Some of the greatest people on earth have suffered the most, for example, Nelson Mandela. Difficult times, pain, failure and loss can be looked upon as learnings, perhaps even as purification in preparation for personal heroism.
How would your life be if you were given the tools to use disappointment, difficulty and heartbreak as a crutch to strengthen yourself? If everything that hurts you, you used to make yourself a better person. The inner work is how you move through the blocks of your shadows that are covering your primal genius. ”The more you sweat in training, the less you will bleed in war.” - Navy Seals
As children, we live through our heart as we grow older we move out of our hearts and into our heads, we are taught to numb our feelings and live in our heads. In my opinion, great art, great architecture, great business, great lives don't just come from our heads, they come from our hearts, our passion, our feelings and our gratitude. I can resonate with Jay Shetty when he says, ”We are wired for generosity but educated for greed.”
I recently asked a medical doctor, “What is in charge - your head or your heart?” He answered, “the head” and I disagreed and bravely challenged him. I said, “You can find people in your profession, who are hospitalised, still alive but clinically brain dead. I am sure that you would agree with me that when your heart stops it’s over and out!”
Succeeding in life and battle is all about training, preparation and putting in the work needed to rise above the adversities that each one of us will face during our lifetimes. Contact me here to book a 1:1 session…
Today, all the FA Cup matches will start with a minute’s silence to bring awareness to mental health issues. I wonder what are the effects of stabbings, shootings and gang-related incidents on young males who have been conditioned not to speak their peers about emotional issues? Now as a Londoner who has been living in Copenhagen for 23 years where ethnic minorities, in general, are also not integrated within mainstream society, I have been observing disenfranchised men for decades.
How hurt we feel about our loss and if we do express it in any way then it is expected to be in a masculine way, for example, retaliation, revenge, speaking about retribution, etc., and that’s what we have been teaching each other for years. Perhaps this is why we have such a high rate of suicide amongst men because the dialogue is just not there. We are not speaking amongst ourselves about emotional issues, being open with one another about how we feel. Speaking up may not solve everything but it will definitely help!
Many of us have heard about soldiers who served in Afghanistan, Iraq and Syria who returned ”home” with post-traumatic stress disorder. I think that there are similarities between war zones and the everyday battle young men are facing in our inner cities. The trauma of thinking that if they look at somebody in the ”wrong” way, they may be stabbed - this mindset are making people do some really crazy stuff. I can engage with these youngsters on their level, I can give them focus and aspiration because if we can change their mental game then we can change their external world.
We are all fragile, we all have traumas and it’s easy to judge people we see struggling with addictions, weight issues, self-esteem, etc. We have all been in a bad place in our heads, take a moment to think about that time in your life and just imagine how far you would have fallen you if didn’t have a support structure around you. There are many of us who think that we have got it together, we should all remember that we are only a few steps away from losing it all.
Fear is a condition for those we help, contact me here to book a 1:1 session...
