All my mentoring and coaching sessions are about real-life issues, they are not about entertainment and my friends who I have spent any significant time with, are typically ones where I can have meaningful conversations. It's a transformative journey where individuals gradually find solace in vulnerability, reaching a stage where openness becomes the norm. I think we all have the capacity to be authentic and empathetic, unfortunately, too many people hide their compassion for others. Why? Perhaps out of fear or societal pressures.
This is revealing
Can you see your own blind spots?
The very notion of a blind spot means that we cannot see it ourselves, therefore, we often need an external perspective to identify them. For example, a trusted advisor, mentor or coach, somebody who can show us another set of lenses and partnerships are crucial to this journey as it’s really difficult to do this all on your own. A simple mathematics analogy, there are adders and subtracters, there are multipliers and dividers, and they are all around us - What do these people look like to you? What do you look like to them? What kind of energy are you bringing and what type of energy are you receiving? These types of journeys are much easier to take together in partnership with a coach or mentor, there is no recipe and there will be challenges along the journey. I do not have ‘a just do this solution’ as everyone is different.
As a coach I offer guidance, skill development, and accountability. Are you ready to look at your blind spots? Contact me via email arrange a short discovery meeting when you are ready for unbiased feedback,
Change is in the air
The Danish club
In my experience from living in Denmark, there is immense pride in the achievements of Danes on the international stage. Within the Danish football community, Brentford are affectionate known as the "Danish club." This recognition is owed to several key factors, for example, the presence of Thomas Frank as the head coach, a line-up boasting five Danish players in their first team squad, and the ownership of Matthew Benham, who is also Danish solidifies this connection.
Thomas Frank's dedication to constant improvement and innovation in coaching tactics has notably shaped the team's approach. It's worth mentioning that he benefits from the guidance of a leadership mentor who aids him in refining his communication, man-management, and leadership skills. This combination of factors not only contributes to Brentford's success but also reflects the Danish influence and emphasis on continuous growth and innovation in the footballing world. I think having someone in a mentorship or coaching role can make a substantial difference in one's journey toward success and fulfilment regardless of whether it's in career advancement, personal growth, skill-building, or even in maintaining motivation.
Making the right choices
““Dear Managers,
Your job is not to make people work harder. Your responsibility to help your team achieve their goals, let them know that their work matters, and then recognise and reward those who consistently help the team deliver timely, high quality and positive outcomes.””
I think we all have different opinions, the problem starts when we feel our opinion is worth more than what anyone else can say. Authentic leaders know they can learn a lot from those that think differently than they do. Contact me via e-mail for a confidential 1:1 session
Acronyms help
The next time you have an important decision to make, try using this cool “B.R.A.I.N” acronym:
B: What are the Benefits?
R: What are the Risks?
A: What are my Alternatives?
I: What does my Intuition (heart) tell me?
N: What if I do Nothing?
You need self-discipline
It’s not what you have learned that is decisive for your future, it’s whether you can put your head down and discipline yourself to pay the price repeatedly until you finally obtain your objective. Learning to effectively lead yourself and others all comes down to discipline, and you’ll need self-discipline to set your goals and make plans for their accomplishment.
You will also need self-discipline to:
- continuously revise and upgrade your plans with new information,
- focus on the most important thing you need to do at that specific moment,
- invest in yourself every day and build yourself up personally and professionally,
- learn what you need to do to become successful,
- delay gratification, save your money and organise your finances,
- focus on your goals and dreams and off your fears and doubts,
- respond positively and constructively in the face of difficulty.
Contact me via e-mail to book coaching, mentoring or 1:1 sparring sessions.
A good fit
I’m always trying to identify how I can be of service to others. I’ve had mentors in my career, and I’ve also learned from being in the trenches for many years. When choosing a mentor you should ask yourself whether you admire this person for his or her achievements and industry experience. I think your mentor should ideally be someone who shares your professional outlook and perhaps has even accomplished the goals you hope to achieve. I’m a student of the selling game and am constantly looking at best practices and at people who have positive influences both on people and revenue. Therefore, I think that it’s really important to pick your mentor carefully as they have to spend time with you as well.
Life is just a moment
There are times when we all long for a simple way out, a procedure to follow rather than a process to understand. I think a mentor is someone who shares their knowledge, skills, and experience, to help another to develop and grow; and a coach is someone who provides guidance to a client on their goals and helps them reach their full potential. There is no reason why you cannot be both a coach and mentor, as the skillsets required to fulfil these roles are similar and to some degree interchangeable, for example, forming relationships to help a person develop. They are both rooted in learning and training and require a level of trust, respect, and communication in order to work.
When I am coaching, I usually coach on a specific topic or skill and focuses on “you”. I expect that after coaching this specific topic or skill you will be able to perform in a day-to-day basis using the knowledge gained from it. When mentoring, I’m focused on the present and future whilst using my experience and perspectives gained from the past elevate and evolve the current relationships. Does this make sense? Contact me now to book your coaching and mentoring sessions.
Reason and rationality
Fear is natural and I think it’s central to the human experience and these fears often come in disguise, for example, a fear that you’re not enough. The fear of not being good enough can surface as anxiety that you can’t explain or rationalise. Over the years of coaching and mentoring conversations, I’ve found that tapping into the imagination is the most powerful complement to traditional memory. The imagination gives us the ability to tell stories and form images about what is going on for us.
“The best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety.”
Guiding entrepreneurs
Sometimes being an entrepreneur can be really lonely. Mentors can help to open hives of thought that an entrepreneur may not have considered. Mentoring is an age-old practice of transferring knowledge and experience through personal relationships. The benefits of having a business mentor is often overlooked by eager entrepreneurs who want that instant gratification. A mentor can help entrepreneurs learn how to navigate many of the challenges typically faced by social entrepreneurs.
Mentors have been present in all walks of life and all disciplines for thousands of years and a good mentor will teach you how to think, not what to think. Contact me via e-mail if you are looking for a business professional with the experience to provide personalised support, sound business advice and encouragement to help you develop your own abilities and insights.
More tips
Image c/o Susan David
I think a good mentor will:
1. Push you harder than you expected
2. Guide you with better questions
3. Expect continuous improvement
4. Dare you to dream big
5. Challenge assumptions
6. Be a lifelong student
7. Appreciate self-taught mentees
8. Teach you how to think, not what to think
Pause and reflect
According to the Oxford English dictionary, “…a pause is a short period when you stop doing something before continuing, and when you reflect on something, you think deeply about it.” In these strange, uncertain and frightening times, how is it that some people ‘keep calm and carry on’, while others panic?
Get active and do some form of regular physical activity, even if it’s just walking 10 minutes a day.
Keep learning as your mind need to keep active too, so give it a regular workout.
Random acts of kindness are contagious, please spread the word.
We are hardwired to want social connections as they are essential to good mental wellbeing.
Take time to notice things, whether it’s your neighbour’s new hairstyle or reflecting on your experiences.
Caring for others, it’s essential to do what’s right for the global community.
Discover the person you were born to be
Stress is the body’s response when it senses danger. We all experience stress and need it to function, but when stress interferes with our lives, it becomes a problem. Too much stress, for too long, can make us ill. If unaddressed, stress can cause mental health issues like depression or anxiety and harm our physical health. Listen to your being, it’s continuously giving you hints. It is a still, small voice and it does not shout at you, that is true. If you are a little silent you will start feeling your way. ‘
“Never try to be another, and you will become mature. Maturity is accepting the re-sponsibility of being oneself, whatsoever the cost. Risking all to be oneself, that’s what maturity is all about.”
I offer a customised process for implementing, executing, and measuring your results, once you have identified, defined, and described the results you want. I’ll give you the tools and inspire you to tap into your personal drive, identifying and leveraging natural talents, and applying them toward accomplishing your goals. Contact me via e-mail when you are ready to discover and create your ideal future.
Increase your activities
The pandemic over the past 2 years should have taught us to focus on mental health and well-being. I think it’s time to focus on being a better human first, and then the science of being a good salesperson will take care of itself. Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being.
The biggest mistake people make when it comes to listening is they’re so focused on what they’re going to say next or how what the other person is saying is going to affect them that they fail to hear what’s being said. When you focus on what’s going wrong then emotions take over your attention, the words come through loud and clear, but the meaning is lost. Remember mental health affects how we think, feel, and act and keeping your brain healthy involves habits that keep the rest of you healthy.
A gift
Six things mentally strong people do:
1. They move on and don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves.
2. They embrace change and welcome challenges.
3. They stay happy and don’t waste energy on things they can’t control.
4. They are kind, fair and unafraid to speak up.
5. They are willing to take calculated risks.
6. They celebrate other people’s success and don’t resent that success.
A process to understand
I recently discovered a beautiful Hebrew word, “kavod”, and it means honour and respect. Honour and respect are very important in any society but even more so in Middle Eastern societies. The Middle East is a place where people swear “on the honour of their mother” without thinking too much. Perhaps we should ask ourselves, “Is it kavod?” before everything we say, think, or do.
Most people don’t know the difference between coaching, mentoring, and training. Rather than having a one size fits all approach, I try to use self-discovery methods to enable the customer to see where they fit in. If you want your brand to stand out in these competitive, unstable times, you’ll want to shift from a product-based “what” brand to a mission-driven “why” business. Shifting your brand and business from “What” to “Why" will bring huge economic benefit and help you secure optimal customer preference and loyalty.
A deep human focus
There may be things present in our lives and our habits that we are not happy about. We want change, yet as hard as we try, sometimes, we are just not seeing the level of profound change we desire. Is there an area of your life you’ve tried changing, made some progress but somehow ended up in the same spot you started in? Real behaviour changes are very difficult to bring about by effort and willpower alone. Contact me via e-mail for 1:1 consultations.
“There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.”
Don’t be afraid of making mistakes
The results that are expected of us in selling are sales, and the only time that we are working is when we are doing something that contributes directly to that result. Selling is when you are face to face with real life customers who are willing and capable of buying a product (or service). Today’s businesses are learning from the science of change that they must recreate themselves even when they would like to believe that the old business will go on forever.
“The best way to predict the future is to create it.”
Which means to have a vision and even though the vision is in the air or sky, you start to build a foundation under your dreams. All high achievers are result orientated, they dream big dreams and focus on results not activities. The key is to be clear about the results that you are trying to accomplish and ask yourself the following questions:
1) What results are expected of me?
2) What am I supposed to produce in my job?
3) Why am I employed here?
Please reach out if you have questions about how it can impact your organisation or yourself.
Embark on your journey now
As a salesperson you already know there is a vast difference between understanding something well enough to buy it as opposed to understanding it well enough to sell it. Zig Ziglar described selling as a transference of feeling and I tend to agree with him. I think effective sales procedures work everywhere and you do not need to be a “natural born” salesperson in order to be a good one. Selling is an exciting profession and in many ways a complex one. There are many specialists in the field and no one person has a monopoly on all the information.
The reaction to success is different for different people. A common problem people experience, following success, is to go into an emotional dive or feel depressed. There may be a bit of an anti-climax afterwards due to the loss of focus and routine. I have never seen a spreadsheet that tells you how you should treat people. How do you react when you experience a dive in emotions? Contact me via e-mail for tolerance, understanding as well as solid actions.