wisdom

Please give me a hand

A young student once asked a wise monk, “Master, how do I stop taking everything so personally?”

The monk smiled and said, “To stop taking things personally, you must learn what actually belongs to you and what never did.”

“Most of what people say or do is a reflection of their own inner weather, not a judgement of your worth.”

“When a storm passes overhead, you do not ask, ‘What did I do wrong?’ You simply let it pass.”

“In the same way, another person’s moods, words, or reactions are often storms that were brewing long before you arrived.”

“Your peace is not threatened unless you hand it over.”

“Taking things personally comes from believing you must control how others think, feel, or receive you.”

“But remember, you are not responsible for managing the emotions that live inside someone else’s mind.”

“The moment you stop trying to be understood by everyone, you reclaim your freedom.”


The three gates

What are the three rules before you speak?

The great Sufi poet, Rumi, believed that before we speak our words should pass through three gates.
- At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?”
- At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?”
- At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

“Before you speak, listen.
Before you write, think.
Before you spend, earn.
Before you invest, investigate.
Before you criticise, wait.
Before you pray, forgive.
Before you quit, try.
Before you retire, save.
Before you die, give.”
— William Arthur Ward